The Routemaster Bus

I was really fucked off when they killed off the Routemaster bus. So were 81% of Londoners. Why don't the cunts listen to us?

We have lost the marvellous sight of Routemaster weaving its way down King's Road, the sound of the rattle of its engine and its innovative open platform. They formed part of the fabric of the city. I regularly used Routes 11, 14, 19 and 22.

The advantages of the Routemaster are well documented:

* the ability to jump on and jump off anytime the bus stopped;
* the width of the bus was suitable for the narrow London streets;
* a dedicated driver focused on driving;
* the reassuring presence of a bus conductor to collect tickets, answer questions without delaying the bus and to upkeep standards of behaviour of passengers.

The replacement is inferior:

* the Titan IV is a beast of a bus - it is too wide for our streets;
* the Titan IV is badly designed - people getting on the bus often are in the way of people getting off from the upper deck; and the walkways and seating are too narrow at the rear of the lower deck;
* too many mothers/nannies are bringing buggies onto the buses; in the old days, they had to fold them up and carry the children onto the bus.
* the drivers are simply appalling - how many are actually British? How qualified are the drivers?
* the bendy buses are too long for London streets. One by itself is OK but three in a row is bad; they block crossings and traffic lights;
* the beeps from the Oystercard machine are too loud;
* the beeps from the exit are too loud;
* the brakes on all the new buses are if anything too efficient: too many people are thrown about on braking; and, finally,
* the buses are filthy - people are eating and drinking on them and leaving litter - no authority is enforcing tidiness.

I suggest bring back the Routemaster: keep the chassis, add an electric engine and bring back the bus conductor. Ensure that the conductor is a figure of authority like in days gone by. Keep the single decker buses. Harmonise them so that they are all green.

Disabled people across London should be given free vouchers to catch taxis - much better suited to their needs with one-on-one help from the driver.

One other thing: close Victoria Coach Station. It is disgusting and it attracts disgusting people. We must ban these intercity coaches from the C-zone. Now that we are in 21st century, we must construct a system to direct people to the beginning of motorways from where they then can catch the appropriate coach to their destination.